Does eHarmony Really Work?

So, after a long-term relationship, I let lose a bit. I decided that instead of moping, I was going to be confident and put myself out there. Well, I did. I attracted trouble. Trouble that I willingly accepted.

Why?

Reflecting on that time, I now know it was because of insecurities, once again- the complete opposite of what I wanted to embody.

I had accepted any guy into my life because I wasn’t sure if I would ever get a relationship, again.

Who wants to deal with this mess of a mind? The eating disorders? The emotional roller coaster? Who would willingly subject themselves to that sort of punishment?

After a bad break-up (your typical cheating, lying, bad boy), I wanted to give up. I stayed in bed all day, cried myself to sleep, and only woke to pee, grab a drink, or because my sleeping pill wore off. I did a little google-ing, one day, and decided to give eHarmony a shot.

Straight up– that’s how I’m playing this.

I followed the prompts to set up my profile, but I made sure to lay it all out there. This is me. Take it or Bye, boy, bye.

I wound up on and off the site for a few months. I met nice guys, but never felt the “spark.” I went on two second dates, but that’s it. I found a lot of guys that where just like the users I could find down the road.  I found a few really wonderful guys, but there was always something missing.

Fuck it!

I threw my hands up.

When my subscription is up, I’m done.

Two weeks before my subscription expired, I was still checking my matches in the slight chance, with the minute bit of hope that remained in me, of someone being “the one.”

12/31/15- This guy seems interesting… travels a lot… Osan? Where is Osan? (South Korea, by the way)… military nerd… looks damn good in a suit… I’ll send him a “smile.” 

That “smile” was returned back to me with the initial conversation prompts eHarmony provides. We quickly exchanged questions and responses, likes and dislikes, until it was time to actually send a message to each other.

This dude was so inquisitive. He asked a million questions. Like paragraphs. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it.

Is he weird or just really interested? 

His curiosity caused me to be curious, too. We wound up sending paragraphs of conversation to each other, questioning everything from favorites foods and superheros, to family, religion, and card games…

In the first week, we transitioned from eHarmony messages to WhatsApp and Facebook messenger. And then Skype.

Everyday, we communicated. When we started Skyping, it was hours. Hours every night. Sometimes, not even talking. Each of us doing our own thing, just in the presence of the other.

Three weeks into exchanging messages and videos, I went and got a passport. Six weeks in, I applied for financial aid and re-enrolled on school to work on my next degree.

What was it about this guy that made me so… motivated?

April 2016- Mr. Military came back to the states on leave. His dad and great grandparents happen to live within 2 hours from me. Well, we met. I felt like a crazy person going to pick this guy I had never met in person before up from the airport.

This is insane in the membrane!

But there he was like. Like a bullshit scene in a romantic comedy, he dropped his bags at the terminal and swiftly walked up to me to hug me.

Well, he’s real… (I poked him just to make sure.)

We spent 3 1/2 weeks meeting each other’s families, and me showing him around Philly, introducing him to cheesesteaks and scrapple, local creameries, and some cool historic sites and Italian markets!

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To be honest, I would’ve married him. We joked continuously about driving to Atlantic City.

See, I told I was crazy…

I know I wear my heart on my sleeve, but this is excessive…

When he left, it felt like my heart had been crushed. It was like a physical separation without an actual break up, but with all the same excruciating pain.

August 2016- My first international flight. My first flight ever was Philly to Seattle. Go big or go home, I figured. If I’m going to fly, I might as well fly across the country. Well, if I’m going to take my first international flight, it might as well be on the opposite side of the world.

Together, we were able to buy the tickets. I left Philly 6:30am headed for an 8hr layover in Detroit. (Did I mention I was running on 2hrs of sleep?)

Next was the 13hr flight to Incheon Airport. I was so surprised that I got meals on the flight. And guess what… I ate all of them! Rice and all! (Stupid carbs. Why must you taste so good?)

I got my passport stamped, grabbed my luggage, and there he was in humid South Korea, flowers in hand, and wearing a big smile and his favorite Yoda shirt.

I spent 10 days playing house, cooking up a storm, experiencing a new culture, taking in some of the sites, and being introduced to his friends.

I already eluded to it in a previous post, but something else happened while I was in Osan… he asked me to marry him. (More about that, later).

We started talking about his new base and our future and decided a civil ceremony on his next leave to the US would be the smartest decision. (There is a lot involved when your get married and are overseas.)

Did I mention that his next leave was the following month?

Surprise, folks! Sammy Bundo got married!

So, yeah… I knew I loved this guy a month into talking with him. “You just know.” That’s what people tell you. “You just know.” What the hell does that even mean? How do you know ‘you just know’???

I was overwhelmed with this new feeling. I had loved before, but this was just different. I can’t really explain it any other way. My grandmother, my mom’s mom… she knew “it,” too, with my grandfather. She described it perfectly, “An inner peace.”

You know how they say, “There’s someone out there for everyone?” Well, my guy was in Osan, South Korea. The other side of the world.

It took a lot of users and abusers to realize what I really wanted in a life partner.All the hurt and heartache led me where I needed to go.

Don’t give up hope.

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The Bucket List

Today was all about thrills. After I saw the movie “The Bucket List,” like most people, I immediately started thinking of things I want to do before my time comes. Some items are extravagant, others are simple. Some cost a lot, others are free. Some I have completed, others still require time.

The more I thought about this list, the more lists I started forming. Now I have a notebook full of lists: Restaurants to Eat At, Books to Read, States to Visit, Countries to Visit… My list of lists is endless and ever-growing!

I wanted to sing the National Anthem at a Blue Rocks game (Wilmington’s minor league baseball team). I did that a little out of high school.

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I graduated college! I did that this past May!

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I wanted to fly in a plane. Three years ago, not only did I take my first flight, but I flew across the country to Seattle, WA for a Phi Theta Kappa Convention!

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Today, I not only was in a plane, but I jumped out of it! That’s right!  I crossed “skydiving” off my Bucket List. I could not believe I went through with it! Barry did it, too! I couldn’t believe it! My mom started crying as we boarded the plane. It was freezing! Oddly enough, I wasn’t thinking “Oh my gosh! Am I crazy? I can’t wait to get back on land.” I was thinking, “Oh my gosh its freaking freezing up here! I can’t wait to get in the car to warm up!” Hahah! Looking back on it, I don’t think I was ever scared, just full of excitement and adrenaline!

DSCN0524After an hour drive to Free Fall Adventures, endless initially of paperwork and saying that we won’t sue, we were briefed by an instructor with an incredibly thick New Zealand accent. Next, we met the instructors we would be flying with. This is Brian… He reminds me a Deeks (Eric Christian Olsen) from NCIS:LA… He took great care of me! Plus, he was super attractive! Good a girl ask for more? Haha!

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After about a 15 minute accent into the sky, we shuffled our way to the door of the plane and out we went. There was no turning back! The view still plays back in my head like a movie. It was so surreal! We descended 2 1/2 miles to the ground. The wind whipping at my face. At one point, after we first jumped, I opened my mouth to “woo hoo” and I don’t actually know if anything came out! “Oh my gosh! I’m falling! WP_004350I’m flying! Lord, keep us safe!” When we reached a certain altitude, Brian pulled the cord and the parachute deployed. After a brief delay and upward tug, we were floating.

It was so peaceful and tranquil. I could see Atlantic City on one side and Philadelphia on the other. Brian and I had a normal conversation on our way down. He even asked if I wanted to to steer the chute. “Nope! I’m fine! Thanks, though!”

When we landed, I kind of messed things up and fell to my knees like a dork, but at least I didn’t face-plant! Once we were unhooked from each other, I had to give him a hug! Then, I thanked God for a safe landing! I reunited with Barry, and then with my tearful mom, who would not let go of me!

Here’s the video of us coming in for a landing. Barry’s chute is the one that looks like a German flag. His instructor was from Germany and before we boarded the plan gave Barry the best advice:

Range (the instructor):Is this your first jump?

Barry: Yeah.

Range: Can I give you some advice? Don’t F*** this up.

We started laughing our butts off! Brian and I are the last pair to land.

Other things still on my list are marriage, children, and Master’s degree.

What’s on your Bucket List?

Following our adrenaline rush, we met up with dad for a “We’re Alive” dinner at my favorite Mexican restaurant, El Jefe. I greeted dad with a chest bump and a big hug! We sat down to chorizo con queso and 3 orders of cebollitas (my favorite). The four of us, then, dug into El Molcajete Estilo, AKA “El Jefe! This is the molten rock bowl filled with a hot reed sauce, chicken breast, steak, queso fesco, cebollitas, and jalepenos (we asked for extra), served with a side of salad, rice, and refried beans, along with four warm tortillas.

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MMMMM! I love Mexican food!

It was a great day! Currently, I’m catching up on blogging, uploading videos and photos, sending resumes, and chowing on some celery!

Oh yeah, on our way to New Jersey, we drove past the Weinermobile!!!

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Hope that made you smile as much as it did me!

DDDD

Yesterday was a Vitalicious- sort of day. On night shift, we had pizza, and all day I was craving more pizza. I never crave pizza… ever! Glad I keep this baby in the freezer:

Tomato and Cheese

Tomato and Cheese

What I like about this VitaPizza is that there is a very thin crust, so it crisps nicely in the toaster oven, theres a thin layer of sauce and tons of diced tomato and garlic!

Today is, what we in the Bundo house call, “Daddy-Daughter Date Day!”

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I had to wake up early this morning to drive to the hospital where my clinics rotation is to gather information for my patients this week. After that, I picked up the father and we headed to Philly. A few months ago, on my way to visit some family in Philly, I saw a billboard for the Titanic exhibit t the Franklin Institute. Dad and I have always had a fascination with the Titanic. We used to watch documentaries every Sunday morning on the Discovery channel. Luckily, through my recycling rewards points, I had a “buy one get one free” ticket for the museum.
We had a great time! At the beginning of the tour, you get a boarding pass with the name of a passenger. At the end of the tour, you find out if you survived the event.
Dad was 44 yr old, Mr. William Harbeck of Paris, traveling 2nd class to NY. He was a filmmaker, hired by White Star, to film Titanic’s maiden voyage. He did not survive.

I was Ms. Marie Grice Young, a 36 yr music instructor, to Teddy Rossevelt’s daughter, from NY, in first class, on my way to DC. I made it.
Some of the artifacts were amazing. They had light bulb! Yes, a light bulb, they pieced back together! It was neat to read little bios on some of the passengers and see some of their recovered belongings, including clothing, letters, business cards, and stationary. There was also a live “iceberg” for you to touch to understand how cold the water was. They recreated main rooms of the ship, like the stair case, bedrooms, and hallways. It really sucked you into the period. The only bummer, was that we could not take pictures. I did manage to snag a few though. Shhhhh… it’s a secret.

beautifully recreated doorway

beautifully recreated doorway

the coolest picture of the day!

the coolest picture of the day!

entering the boiler room

entering the boiler room

After the exhibit, we explored the remainder of the museum. One of my favorite parts ever since I was a kid is the Giant Heart! Its a huge heart that you can walk through. It takes you through all the parts of the heart through a maze of stairs, meanwhile you hear a heart beat to enhance the effect.

getting ready to head inside the heart

getting ready to head inside the heart

playing in the kids area

playing in the kids area

cheezeing it up inside an artery

cheezeing it up inside an artery

My absolute favorite area, besides the observatory, is the planetarium. Astronomy has always been a passion of mine. (Guess who owns the seasons of “The Universe?” This chick.) In fact, up until sophomore year of high school, my plan was to attend Cornell for Astronomy or the AFROTC Aeronautical Nursing program. Any way, we saw a film about black holes. Black holes give me the chills. I’ve always been fascinated by them and have written several papers on them throughout my schooling.

having an 80 yr old Singer sewing machine, I appreciate the beauty of this one

having an 80 yr old Singer sewing machine, I appreciate the beauty of this one

a fancy old music box

a fancy old music box

The museum has rooms focused on different areas of science: trains, planes, space, electricity (duh, Ben Franklin… Franklin Institute), engineering, and IMAX, and 3D theatre, a giant pendulum, any much more! So many of the staple exhibits have been there since I was a kid. It was so nice to revisit them. Plus, your inner child pokes out its head in all of the interactive “Please Touch” exhibits and games!

I turn Ben on. (get it? cause its a light switch?) *knee slap*

I turn Ben on. (get it? cause its a light switch?) *knee slap*

who needs travelocity?

who needs travelocity?

old school

old school

My father, Cpt. America, saluting USAF

My father, Cpt. America, saluting USAF

Chug-a-Chug-a Choo-Choo

Chug-a-Chug-a Choo-Choo

I'd kill for this telescope!

I’d kill for this telescope!

After a few hours in the museum, dad and I walked through the atrium to find the most adorable little girl getting her face painted! This is probably one of the cutest kids I’ve ever seen! Her mom let me snap a shot of her.

the most beautiful tiger i've ever seen

the most beautiful tiger i’ve ever seen

We said, “peace out,” to Big Ben (the guy, not the clock) and headed for one of my favorite Wholefoods. Its on Pennsylvania Ave. in Philly. Dad and I wondered around in there, grabbed a few cookies and bagels for the week, and of course, picked up this beautiful fruit salad:

Goodbye, Ben!

Goodbye, Ben!

Hello, fruity deliciousness!

Hello, fruity deliciousness!

After seeing all that food, we drove  around downtown Philly until we headed for South St. We couldn’t decide what we were in the mood for, but my dad said we should go to Maoz. (I was giggling like a little school girl, inside, because I wanted to go there all along but didn’t want to force vegetarian food on him). I explained how the ordering worked and he was willing to give it a try. Dad and I usually love anything with a topping bar. We split the #1. This is a falafel pita with hummus and eggplant, served with Belgian fries and drink. We upgraded to the sweet potato fries, then stuffed our falafel stuffed whole wheat pita with vegetable salad (tomato, zucchini and cucumbers), reed cabbage salad, cilantro sauce, sweet peppers (a must), grilled cauliflower, and later some garlic sauce. Maoz is the only place I will ever eat beets so I grabbed a little cup of that. Dad was so funny! “This is really good! I wish I had one around work. I’d get this for lunch at least once a week! Do they sell this in stores? Let’s get some.” Luckily, I can make it at home! Dad told me we are going to the grocery store to pick up falafel ingredients tomorrow after class! lol This was a really delicious meal. What made it even better, was seeing how much my dad enjoyed it! Perfect size for the two of us to split!

MMMMM... Warm falafel loaded with veggies in every bite!

MMMMM… Warm falafel loaded with veggies in every bite and sweet potato fries!

When I got home, I snacked on a Gnu Brownie, smeared with some Low Sodium Better n’ Peanut Butter. Then I completed some paperwork for clinical for Monday, and put on some jams and danced around the living room to do a little cardio.

Wow! What a fantastic day!

RIP to a Philly favorite: Sally Star!